Wolf School with Constance and Merricat: Introduction

• Siobhan O'Brien Holmes

Ah-wooooooooooooooooooooooo. Hello, and welcome to Wolf School with Constance and Merricat, your Wolves in Residence. We’re so excited to–

That’s Professor Merricat, actually. 

You are not a professor, Merricat. I’m not calling you that.

But I’m a teacher! 

No you’re not. We’re just playing. Stop being so silly.

Okay, fine. But I’m in charge of writing on the white board. 

Fine. Sorry, everyone, where was I? Oh yes, welcome to Wolf School! We’re really excited to have you here with us. Do you know, I actually think this is the first online wolf school in history, so you’ll have to bear with us if there are technical difficulties. We wolves don’t use the internet much so it’s all a bit of a learning curve, isn’t it Merricat?

It is for you because you’re old. I use the internet all the time.

I’m 16, Merricat. Only seven years older than you. Anyway, can we stop arguing? This is important. We have work to do.

Whatever. 

Alright, students! Shall we get started? In case you missed the induction meeting yesterday, Wolf School is where you’ll learn all about wolves–

Like us! 

Yes, exactly. Wolves like us, but you’ll mostly be learning about the ones in literature and legends, and how we’re portrayed in books for children and teenagers. We’ve had a rough time of it, PR-wise, you know. We get a bad wrap thanks to a few silly stories about pigs and little girls and – Merricat, please do not spit! That is utterly disgusting!

But that Red makes me so mad!

I know she does, but can we focus, please? These poor people don’t need to see you spitting on the ground, for goodness’ sake. But yes, my sister’s right – Little Red Riding Hood didn’t do our image any favours. Did you know that story was inspired by the werewolf trials of the 16th century?

Roooaaaaaaaaaaaaar!

Thank you, Merricat.

I’m being a werewolf!

I got that, thank you.

I wish I could be a werewolf. 

Yes, I know. And you can talk to the people about that later if you like, but right now, I think we should wrap this up. It’s nearly time to hunt for dinner.

Fine. Bye then!

Right, well I’ll leave it there then. Thanks so much for joining us at Wolf School, everyone, and we’ll see you for your first class very soon. Oh – homework! Yes, before your first class, if you could think of your favourite representation of wolves in literature, that would be lovely, please. Then we can discuss them all as a group.

Hurry up! I’m starving. 

Alright, thanks everyone! Until next time. Ah-wooooooooooooooooooooooo.